A mile on shoes 488 years old

A mile on shoes 498 years old

Don't steal my thunder!
I've waltzed this road on my own,
I've listen to the air, and the water and the fire and the earth,
I've fallen down and gotten up again.

Don't ask me to give you my burden,
Don't take my merit,
I've suffered and I've cleansed,
I've cleansed strangers that i will never met,
And I didn't ask them for anything,
I did not ask that they believe in me,
I did not ask that they give me their soul,
And now you want to take my win?
Like a vulture
Why?

Because I seem desperate?
I am desperate to regain my health,
But I know I will get it back
How dare you use the open door I give your kind
How dare you use my invitation to try to crop my soul?
And I know it was not Jesus
Because him and I have been cool since a while back
He offered me his tribe but he also loved me and respected me for choosing to walk my own path
Him and I are one of a kind
You have a hold on ego of those who follow him,
you make his church tainted,
He has their heart,
but you still hold a grip on their minds.

But my soul is mine
It may be broken
It may be incomplete
but I've lost it and regained it
all on my own,
because that was my choice,
don't use the name of my brother to take our win,
don't use the angels of his members to open doors that otherwise you know you would never see,
You did this with my brothers and sisters 498 years ago,
But not now.

I was raised by your tribe,
And i'm not as innocent as they were 498 years past
I can see you very clear now,
And I dare you use the serfs again to come claim what I have earned with my pain, blood and sweat
Its 498 years later and we wont renounce her,
Its 498 years later and we stand by her,
Its 498 years later and you wont erect a palace on top of my temple.

I am of the God and the Goddess
I serve them
And through them I forgive you
For you did not know who you were dealing with
May love and grace continue to shower the hearts of those that you have a grip on
Their minds will follow sooner or later
You may find a new home
But you will never get my soul.

100

You were an adventure
I crossed the threshold
I saw the other side
I opened my eyes

You were the adventure
The adventure that my life was meant to have
you were the threshold
You were the mountain that I was meant to climb

The adventure turned you into my tormentor
the adventure shook
the adventure showed me to hold on
to get the last drop
of that sweet nectar that was your love.

But you were just an adventure
You were my door
I would have never lost my self
and I would have never go on a quest
to get back what I lost on my way down.

Bend Space like Neo

Bend Space like Neo

My face is covered

but my heart is open.

The tears of past

are now forgotten.

The blues are behind now,

I bend space like Neo now,

build a maze with a trio

there is no more debris en mi camino.

Wait...

WAIT...

Creating is a byproduct of being human,

If we take a breath, we create CO2,

If we think, we create our reality,

Movement is glorified and praised

Growth is put in a pedestal yet,

What is really challenging sometimes is to wait,

To hold down the ground,

To fill the space between breaths,

To let life pass by, 

Yet more challenging is to be content

to accept our faiths as those who wait

to accept the juice and receive the gift of patience,

to wait until patience becomes faith,

and to wait until faith becomes truth.

So if you are waiting,

If you are holding down the ground,

if you're listening and observing,

if you record without judge,

Thank you!

Take a bow and accept your speed,

we are all wrong,

growth for growth's sake is cancer

growth for a purpose is life,

so if you feel like you are waiting,

and you are not creating,

fill the space between the breaths,

and go on a quest of truth,

for the gifts of the juice are yours.

BEING A WOMAN OF MY TRIBE

What does it take to be a woman of my tribe?

If you have been forged on fire,
If you have bled for others,
If you have known first hand self harm,
If you have felt so much that a stare from your eyes melted the object of your rage,
You are a woman of my tribe.

If you have loved so deeply that the ocean is your best friend,
If you have remain soft despite your scars,
If you know the power of an apology,
If you are home to those that are misunderstood,
If your laugh builds up whatever that is torn,
If you have magic in your fingertips and your toes,
You are a woman of my tribe.

For every woman can relate to these sentences, every woman is a woman of my tribe.

For being a woman is to carry the elements in our body, and the wand of creation is carried in every womb.

A woman is the magic in the world, a woman is the rabbit whole.

Dare to love a woman of my tribe, once she knows her worth, and you will know the power of the most sacred love, the fire that atones, with their warm hugs and their sweet voice.

Even though every woman is a woman of my tribe, not all of them know it from the start.

So woman... love the woman to your right, love the woman to your left, we are mirrors of the sound that emanates from the eternal fire of the one that never hides but is hardly seen; if we tear each other apart, if we use our power against each other, we are only denying our true self, that of unity, that of true power, that of creation and the epitome of unconditional love.

Woman be fire
Woman be air
Woman be water
Woman be earth

Woman be
Woman wake
Woman step up
Woman take your place

What am I

I

Am

Because

I’VE

Found you

The light  from where I come from

My source…

The space between my dreams.

The Circle of Fire

The Circle of Fire

I went to a much desired retreat on September 21-23rd, 2018 which coincided with the fall equinox, and a full moon, and an overall large number of major events in the spiritual realm. The overall message I take from walking in a dream, in a shamanic journey which this trip represents to me is that of being a witness, I saw mothers love, I saw Quetzalcoatl, messages were delivered and new seeds were planted.

Overall I was asked to move away from performing for others and start performing for the elements, the mountain, the spirit, and in general for presence. Some of the observations that I was able to gather are attached to conditional love, like:

1.  The woman or the line of women in me have strong pain attached with self worth, and hence, every time I, in this body start to feel good, I feel the need to show it off, in any way that is a call for approval. 
2. More often than not, the attention sought is in the form of male energy. Not necesarily a gender, but rather a figure of authority or someone whose approval is gather high in prestige for example. And personally, the more  I observe, the more I find that its annoying. Because then of course I come to question if I do things because of who and what I am or if I do them to seek approval, and to feel worth, to accumulate points in a ridiculous point accumulation contest with no winner.

Among other observations that are present to me through the path that I have taken by deciding to pursuit the path of the sorceress, the one that serves source, that works with source, that guards source and that will eventually merge with it.

The fact is that by me entering the path in which I am, I have currently been in a position where I can only see now things that are immediately necessary for me to see, everything reflects to me right away, And I am bless to be able to discern from receiving information from other people, and the reflection meant for me as a reflection. At the beginning I really started to not like it, I was being asked to step away from things that for me were what I wanted to do, I was taking it as life putting stop signs to my hearts desire, but they were never my hearts desire, I have understood that not getting what I want at the time I want, from when and where I wanted, is a gift and I continue to receive those gifts every day, for they have helped me to question the reason behind this.

I met great teachers, great people and I danced with the desert, for the desert, for the mother, for the night, and as the days progressed, and the classes and the insight got deeper and all I wanted to was to dance , I realized that it was hand in hand with the surrendering that they were talking about, to let love through and let the miracles happen. I started observing my obsessive behaviors and I realized that no matter how much genuinely I want to do things it always came down to, ok now i need some recognition. Furthermore, I am purposely walking away from conditional love, but then I want to evaluate my progress in terms of conditional love. How is that ever going to really help? That my parameters for evaluation must change so, what does that mean? Attempt to identify the times you seek approval, or rather me as a woman in this world. How am I trying to get the praise? and if I am in too deep, then at least log what are the results you are getting, which must likely will be frustration because that is exactly what you are doing yourself when you seek for approval outside yourself, when you can only be certain of your progress when someone else validates it for you.

I leave my self with some words, in this transition to owning self worth, and self love, owning and working with your obsessions as a means to tell you something about yourself:

"Be kind to yourself, and show yourself some love, some patience, some admiration for the work you are doing, not compared to anyone but on what it means to you and how does it feel to you. Did you see a miracle happen? love, openly and with no conditions. Show love just because you have love to give, not because someone deserves it or because someone pleased you, show love regardless of what you get back. You do not need anybody's permission to love, we may need some sort of understanding when it comes to express love, but really loving someone doesn't need the recipient's permission, heck they don't even need to know, just love! Just be aware and let the love flow, the love that comes from you, the love that comes from mother and the love that comes from father."