The Circle of Fire

The Circle of Fire

I went to a much desired retreat on September 21-23rd, 2018 which coincided with the fall equinox, and a full moon, and an overall large number of major events in the spiritual realm. The overall message I take from walking in a dream, in a shamanic journey which this trip represents to me is that of being a witness, I saw mothers love, I saw Quetzalcoatl, messages were delivered and new seeds were planted.

Overall I was asked to move away from performing for others and start performing for the elements, the mountain, the spirit, and in general for presence. Some of the observations that I was able to gather are attached to conditional love, like:

1.  The woman or the line of women in me have strong pain attached with self worth, and hence, every time I, in this body start to feel good, I feel the need to show it off, in any way that is a call for approval. 
2. More often than not, the attention sought is in the form of male energy. Not necesarily a gender, but rather a figure of authority or someone whose approval is gather high in prestige for example. And personally, the more  I observe, the more I find that its annoying. Because then of course I come to question if I do things because of who and what I am or if I do them to seek approval, and to feel worth, to accumulate points in a ridiculous point accumulation contest with no winner.

Among other observations that are present to me through the path that I have taken by deciding to pursuit the path of the sorceress, the one that serves source, that works with source, that guards source and that will eventually merge with it.

The fact is that by me entering the path in which I am, I have currently been in a position where I can only see now things that are immediately necessary for me to see, everything reflects to me right away, And I am bless to be able to discern from receiving information from other people, and the reflection meant for me as a reflection. At the beginning I really started to not like it, I was being asked to step away from things that for me were what I wanted to do, I was taking it as life putting stop signs to my hearts desire, but they were never my hearts desire, I have understood that not getting what I want at the time I want, from when and where I wanted, is a gift and I continue to receive those gifts every day, for they have helped me to question the reason behind this.

I met great teachers, great people and I danced with the desert, for the desert, for the mother, for the night, and as the days progressed, and the classes and the insight got deeper and all I wanted to was to dance , I realized that it was hand in hand with the surrendering that they were talking about, to let love through and let the miracles happen. I started observing my obsessive behaviors and I realized that no matter how much genuinely I want to do things it always came down to, ok now i need some recognition. Furthermore, I am purposely walking away from conditional love, but then I want to evaluate my progress in terms of conditional love. How is that ever going to really help? That my parameters for evaluation must change so, what does that mean? Attempt to identify the times you seek approval, or rather me as a woman in this world. How am I trying to get the praise? and if I am in too deep, then at least log what are the results you are getting, which must likely will be frustration because that is exactly what you are doing yourself when you seek for approval outside yourself, when you can only be certain of your progress when someone else validates it for you.

I leave my self with some words, in this transition to owning self worth, and self love, owning and working with your obsessions as a means to tell you something about yourself:

"Be kind to yourself, and show yourself some love, some patience, some admiration for the work you are doing, not compared to anyone but on what it means to you and how does it feel to you. Did you see a miracle happen? love, openly and with no conditions. Show love just because you have love to give, not because someone deserves it or because someone pleased you, show love regardless of what you get back. You do not need anybody's permission to love, we may need some sort of understanding when it comes to express love, but really loving someone doesn't need the recipient's permission, heck they don't even need to know, just love! Just be aware and let the love flow, the love that comes from you, the love that comes from mother and the love that comes from father." 

Story of a Fallen Star

I was blinded by the smile and your eyes.
After watching about thousands of planets through millions of years, after seeing all the stories and all the lies, one day we crossed paths. And then you saw me, and you blinked your eyes and I could hear your heart. After that we talked every day, you were my only friend, the only one that had ever made me feel alive.

And one day you forgot, I saw your world grow dark, darker than the usual color of the night. I could not hear you, and then one day I saw you in that edge. How could you think you were alone? How could you think your life was not worth?

You see, the sky shined brighter ever since the first time you blinked at me... did you think it was a coincidence? I screamed and you could not hear. So yes! I was blinded, I could not bare to lose that light that comes off from your smile. And I rushed across the skies, I had to come to tell you that you are wrong, that I need you because you make this eternity less dull. Because I didn't know humans until I met you. .... You saw me!

The way it ought to be

Religion, Philosophies, Beliefs and even disbeliefs; these have always capture my attention, I was not sure why until probably now. I always noticed a trend, a set of values that each of them share. However with our current state of affairs, with so much happening in such a little time it is obvious that this is where we need to stop and think.

I read in a website from Jelila Starr, that sometimes by looking at the leaders of a country we can see our own state of mind as a human race. And even though I am not sure I agree with the whole Nibiruan Council I see that this statement might be true after all.

I remember a speech that Obama gave back in the beginning of 2010, after his first year in the Presidency he addressed congress and the people to stop working for a party's interest and to come together to find solutions that our nation and the world face today. He was able to pass the dreaded Health Care reform and I am sure he will be able to pass even more, and this is because I too believe that we are there.

We are at that moment in history where there is not Religion that should matter; there is not philosophy that has to be right. I think that what we can see happening in our world is that only through compromise and cooperation we are going to be able to solve most of the pressuring issues in today's world.

It is time that we stop looking not only at the color, or even gender, but at the race, ethnic background, we have to hold our hands and consciously solve our problems through that what is right. This is a moment where politics, money, government, history, religion, ideology, philosophy, reasoning, and any other kind of code do not fit. It is time to look inside, really deep and recognize our self in everybody else, recognize ourselves in the reflection of the water in a lake and realize that we too are one with everything that surrounds us.

I truly believe that by joining our consciousness outside of rites, and ideology, and culture, if we truly bear ourselves like what we are and join we could shine the light again in this earth and probably even through millions of light years more. Affecting not only our reality but probably leaping into a new one.

I do not think it is a coincidence that we are suddenly in a stage where human population has never been, and this is because I believe that only our joined strength and our voluntary cooperation will make the change. We are so many because we ought to....Think about it.....wouldn’t earth allow this reproduction at the cost of itself if it wasn’t for a good cause?

I invite you to shine the light...

Different People, different roles

Today I had the opportunity to imagine a world full of me's. Like most instances in movies and cartoons (specifically squidward in Spongebob lol) it is not as fun as you might think.

For so long you go through life looking for people that have more in common with you, because you will think that they will understand. But at the end of the day, I now know, that no matter who are you with, what do they like, what do they believe in. EVERYBODY HAS A ROLE, a purpose and if you respect that very fact, your interaction with the world just becomes so much more clear.

Learn all confrom with nothing, keep growing until the day of your last breath. And even that day spend it doing something extraordinary, a kind word will do the trick, the name of the person that you love the most will live forever in the air.

Today is a new day.... Find solutions and do not focus on the problem. Just fix the damn thing!

Viridiana B